My early attempts at story sharing

I've been sharing my thoughts and stories online since 1997, when I created the webpage for the teenage all-girl wannabe punk ska band I was in. I don't remember much about it, except that it had lots of '50s Gil Elvgren pinup girls on it, and I said something about how I was into animal rights and 80s new wave. We were cheekily called Shut Up and Dance, in reference to a Paula Abdul album title and an Aerosmith song.

My next website was called Marisa's Room. It was hosted on Angelfire. It had a huge rotating header gif that said "Marisa's Room", and a sound file played that said, "Get out of my Van Halen t-shirt before you jinx the band and they break up." (Wedding Singer quote in case you didn't know). The background was a dorky 50s atomic pattern. I was always at my husband-to-be's house on their computer working on it.

After I had my first child in 2002, I began an online journal at Diaryland. I wrote about having no friends and my dad dying of cancer. About how amazing home birth is, and how ridiculous the cesarean rate is. I haven't read those entries in years.

Once the term 'blog' was finally in regular use, I had one called Real Mom Style, and had about 1000 visitors a month (I thought that was getting big time!) I think it was about 2005. I posted budget style ideas that were realistic for most moms. It became a chore for me to find fashiony topics to write about, because God was doing something in me, and I always felt the tension of keeping that blog 'secular'.

Then I created a blog called Thrive in 2009 on the Homeschool Blogger platform, and it was about emergency preparedness and godly family living. I reread these entries last night, and was so embarrassed by how sure of everything I sounded. I had been totally immersed in the Christian homeschooling culture, and was getting brainwashed with all of the legalistic things a homeschooling family should be doing to be Godly. This was a time when I was downloading Vision Forum audio teachings, and looking into family integrated churches. Women carry such a weight of burdensome expectations in that culture, and I am glad to be rid of them. I'm so glad I didn't badger my husband to be some kind of greater "Family Leader Patriarch" during that time, or scar my children with fundie homeschooler baggage. It was short lived phase, my kids were too young to notice, and happened mostly in my own head or on the blog. Of course, I remain a Christian homeschooling mom, but free of the extra-Biblical doctrine.

So, now, I still have thoughts and stories, but I won't pretend I can be your life coach, or teach you 10 steps to whatever. I'm still opinionated, but have humbly learned that people grow and ideas change, and we're all at a different spot on the journey. I'd rather not make a fool of myself looking like a know-it-all again. :-)


  1. Marisa, I totally dig this post. Thank you for being transparent here. Glad I'm not the only one who feels this way.


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